


Mudblood/Pureblood Year 1

by Chromatic_Spark



Series: Mudblood/Pureblood [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Animals, Draco Malfoy is Clueless About Muggle Things, Eventual Relationships, F/M, Freeform, Harry Potter is a Brat, Harry Potter is clueless, Hufflepuff, Magic, Magic Users, Orphan - Freeform, Poor, empathic, hermione granger is a brat, hufflepuff pov, long burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2020-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:34:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27416584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chromatic_Spark/pseuds/Chromatic_Spark
Summary: Fay never knew her mother or father. Raised in a government home she's used to being looked down on. She's a smart girl though and knows there's something different about her.When she gets invited to attend Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry she realizes two things:1) children are all the same, magical or not2) there's something in the castle that's up to no good.Can she do anything about it in time?(NB: as a small aside this is a non-TERF space. I do not agree with the views of JKR nor will I engage in debate about them. You can appreciate art but not the artist, be nice to each other folks)
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Mudblood/Pureblood [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2003077
Comments: 3
Kudos: 5





	1. Chapter 1

It was a week before my eleventh birthday when the professor arrived to see me. I’ll admit it was scary to be called into the matron’s office and introduced to this strangely dressed woman. She was jolly and had a kind face though, it was hard not to like her.  
She called herself Professor Sprout. I asked what she was a professor of and the matron scolded me, like always. Sprout laughed, it was a good laugh full of sincere joy.  
“It’s alright, I like an enquiring mind.” She said and the matron just made that clicking noise with her tongue.  
Sprout asked if there was somewhere we could talk by ourselves. Matron Louise didn’t like that but eventually allowed her to go to my bedroom. I shared it with three other girls but they were happy to go and play outside, it was summer after all.  
Our room wasn’t much. We each had a bed, a desk with a pinboard above it, and a set of drawers. We each had a few personal things and we were allowed to decorate. Laura’s board was covered in cutouts from magazines, Tara’s with her glitter-soaked drawings, and Kayleigh’s with photos of everyone and everything. Mine had a lot of leaves and feathers, drawings and cutouts of animals. I like animals.  
Sprout sat on my little bed and after a little hesitation, I sat at my desk. It took a minute to realize I hadn’t told her which bed was mine. She wriggled a little before realizing she’d sat on one of my books and pulled it out to examine. My little corner of the room was always full of books, ones I’d saved up for or gotten from the library mostly.  
“What’s this? ‘Culpepper’s Complete Herbal’, I see we have a shared interest.” She smiled as she put the book to one side.  
“You like plants too?” I ask meekly and she nods vigorously.  
“Oh yes, it’s what I teach.”  
“You’re a botanist?” I was so proud of that word.  
“In a way.”  
“Oh.” I ran out of things to say and sat for a moment swinging my legs.  
“Fay, have you noticed anything strange recently?” She leaned a little closer to me, her voice dropping.   
“Like what?”  
“Like things moving when they shouldn’t or disappearing, or anything your classmates think is scary.”  
I looked away and of course, she knew I was hiding something.  
“Maybe.”  
“What is it? You can trust me.”  
“I can talk to animals,” I whispered.  
“Oh really? That’s wonderful!” She beamed at me. I was so shocked my mouth gaped open. “I have a friend who can do that.”  
“What?”  
“Oh yes. You see, Fay, I’m like you, I’m a witch.” She grinned from ear to ear.  
“A witch?” I squeaked and she nodded.  
“Yes, dear. Watch.” She reached into her jacket, a rather odd shade of greenish-brown, and pulled out a stick. She pointed at a somewhat wilted flower in an old cup on my desk and muttered something. I almost hit the ceiling in shock as a spark jumped from the tip of the stick to the flower, which burst into life and even grew new leaves.   
“How did you do that?”  
“Magic. Would you like to learn?” I nodded silently, unable to tear my eyes off the flower. “Brilliant! Then this-” She flourished an envelope and handed it to me “Is for you.”  
The envelope wasn’t made from normal paper, it felt almost like cloth, and on the front was my name and address. It was sealed with red wax stamped with a shield, I did my best not to break the wax as I opened it.  
The letter inside was made of the same weird paper. I read it carefully. Then I read it again.  
“Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry,” I said aloud.  
“Yes, you can go there instead of a normal school if you want.” She was leaning forward again.  
“It’s like a special school?”  
“Yes. For people like you and me. I Teach Herbology there, that’s the care of magical plants.”  
I started crying, not bawling just soft sobs, I’d long since learned that crying loudly made people angry. “What’s wrong?”  
“I’m sorry, I haven’t got any money. I can’t go to a special school.”   
“Oh, honey, come here.” She gently took my hand and pulled me to sit next to her. She was a big woman, especially compared to me, but it was somehow comforting to be close to her. “Now you don’t have to worry about money. There’s a special fund for children like you. Muggle-born children often can’t afford the things you need so we’ll provide them.”  
“Muggle?”  
“Non-magical. It’s our word for people like your Matron.” She looked down at me.  
“But it’s not a bad word?”   
“No.” I nodded.  
“So I can get everything on that list?” I point to the letter and she nods.  
“Most of it will be second hand or older but yes. And we’ll pay for you to get to London to catch the train to school.”  
“Really!” I bounce up to my feet. The realization of what was happening finally hit. I showered her with thanks and she smiled through them.  
She had a long talk with the Matron afterward and told me she’d be back with me new things in a few days.  
Matron was less than pleased. Someone (I’m sure it was her) told the other children in the house that I was being sent to a special school for children with learning difficulties.   
As a result, James decided it was okay to spend the rest of the summer tormenting me. He got into my room and tore up all my stuff, threw mud at me, knocked drinks over into my lap, and generally treated me like his main form of entertainment.   
When Professor Sprout dropped off a big trunk full of the new things matron locked them in her office and told me I could have them when I left for school and not a moment sooner.  
In all, it was a pretty miserable summer.   
On the day I was due to leave I was given the trunk along with my own backpack full of clothes and taken to the train station. Matron handed me a train ticket and then left me there. She wasn’t a mean woman, not truly. I think she was just scared.   
I got on a train to London and soon found myself alone in the bustling city. Luckily the train station I needed wasn’t far away, I didn’t even have to go on the underground, which would have been impossible with the big old dusty trunk I was dragging along with me.   
I reached platform 9 and stood for a moment to think. I was fairly early according to the letter and of course, the platform it said didn’t seem to exist.   
But why would it exist to everyone? The professor had explained that muggles weren’t supposed to know about magic, so why would the train be in plain sight. I sat on the trunk and waited for a few minutes.   
I noticed a little family with a child about my age pushing a trolley along the platform. I was a little jealous as I’d wanted one of those trolleys but you needed a pound coin to rent it and I had no money at all (James had stolen my little jar of coins a few days ago).  
I watched as they looked around furtively then rushed straight at one of the brick pillars that stood between platforms 9 and 10.   
They popped out of sight and I smiled to myself, I liked being right.  
I checked no one was watching and followed after them. The new platform might not have even been in London. It was open to the sky and the landscape beyond was green, not full of grey houses.   
The train was beautiful, like something out of an old book. It was cherry red with gleaming brass and the carriages looked old as well. I stood amazed for a moment before being pushed roughly out of the way by another family.  
They were so obviously rich and upper class it was like they really needed you to know you were less than them. They wore dark, well-cut clothes in expensive fabrics. The mother was pretty but her face was cold. The father was handsome and carried a silver-headed cane. The boy was the image of his father, each with nearly white blonde hair pulled back from their faces. They didn’t even look at me as they trundled past, I was nothing.  
It was something I was very used to. At school, the St Barts kids were all treated like dirt. Pitied and ignored.   
I dragged my trunk to the side and watched the various families flow in. Not everyone was like those rich ones. There were big families and small, rich and poor, all different skin colors too. I watched older kids greet each other and younger ones meekly introduce themselves. A lot of them had pets of some sort. Mostly cats and owls but I saw one boy with a shock of bright red hair cradling a rat and another, who looked somewhat ill, trying to manhandle a toad.  
The kids started to filter onto the train so I followed suit, hefting my trunk up onto the train and trying to find a seat. I chose a little compartment and sat in one of the window seats before opening the trunk. I’d had a look on my way to London. I had books and uniforms and lots of that strange paper (I think they called it parchment) and some weird pens made from feathers. I pulled out one of the books and opened it carefully. I hadn’t dared even look a little closer while on the train here but now I suppose these things were ordinary. This book appeared to tell the history of the school. I settled back to read as much as I could before we got there.  
“Haven’t you read that yet?” A somewhat haughty voice made me look up.  
A girl with voluminous brown hair stood in the door, she had large straight teeth and the glint in her eye I recognized from school. The zealous look of the know-it-all.  
“Uh- no I haven’t. I-” I was about to explain why I’d been lax but she simply snorted.  
“Well, you’d best hurry up. We are supposed to have read it by the time the term starts!” She snapped and flounced off.   
I was left open-mouthed in the empty compartment. I did just as she said but also made a mental note to sit as far from her as I could if we ever shared a classroom.   
Slowly the train filled up. I was joined by a couple of other first years. They were twins with identical hair and clothes but one talked more than the other. Both of their parents were magical and when I revealed that I had no parents and was muggle-raised they were fascinated.   
They let me get back to reading after a while, content to talk to each other. I envied them, it would be nice to have a sister, or brother, or anything. At St Bart's, we just clung on to whoever we shared a room with. It wasn’t sisterly love or even really friendship, just companionship.   
I’d reached chapter ten by the time the door started to open. Other students would stick their heads in to talk. There was a lot of talk about some boy called Harry and there was another who’d lost his toad but mostly it was just the sort of thing kids talk about when they haven’t met before.   
A lady with a sweets trolly came by. I just shook my head but the twins bought a few bits and pieces. I’ll admit I was curious about wizard food but with no normal money, let alone the glittering gold coins they had, I’d just have to wait till dinner.  
We changed into our uniforms and I stuffed my old pink backpack into my trunk. The uniform was a little too big but it wasn’t terribly obvious it was secondhand. I wasn’t sure about the tie but Pavarti (the talkative twin) helped me with it. She even offered to braid my hair as she noticed I’d kept pushing it out of my face.   
I was embarrassed and said no but accepted the little green hairband she offered me so I could tie it back. I told her I’d return it but she said I could keep it. It was nothing to her but it was a great gesture to me. Luckily she didn’t notice the way my eyes got shiny and I couldn’t talk for a moment.   
We were supposed to leave our trunks aboard and head out, apparently, they’d be taken up to the school for us. I stuck with the twins as we left, it was getting dark now and the flow of children was a little scary.  
A huge man with the biggest beard I’ve ever seen was stood on the platform waving a lantern. He was calling to us first years and guided us down a path to a jetty that stuck out into a lake. In the distance was a huge castle, I’d seen pictures but it was different in real life. Imposing in the darkness.  
We climbed aboard a flotilla of little boats that set off across the water by themselves. I and the twins were joined by a few other students who were gossiping about others in the crowd. Meanwhile, I was silently trying to contain my anxiety.   
We were herded out of the boats and up several flights of stairs. I almost tripped over when a portrait we were passing wished me a pleasant evening. This was going to be a lot to get used to.   
We stopped on a long flight of stairs in front of a huge pair of double doors. A tall woman with steel-grey hair told us to wait there.   
I held on to the banister with sweaty hands as she left and the children around me began to whisper to one another. The boy who’d pushed past me earlier stepped up to the front and faced a boy with choppy brown hair. I couldn’t hear their conversation but judging by the scowl on the blonde boy’s face I guessed it didn’t go well.   
The whispering around me became louder and more troubled until at last, the doors opened. We headed in and I had to stop my mouth from gaping again. The Great Hall was like nothing else I’d ever seen. Four long tables filled with students were headed by another that had what must have been the teachers. Candles floated through the air and above us, the ceiling appeared to have disappeared. Tapestries in four different colors lined the walls and sat in a throne-like chair in the middle of the teachers was a man I could only describe as the wizard you see in storybooks.  
We were led to the front and told to wait till we were called. A ragged old hat was sat on a stool in front of the teachers. Silence fell and I’ll admit I had to stifle a laugh as the battered old thing came to life and began to sing.  
I’d read about this. It was the sorting hat. The school was divided into four houses and supposedly you were sorted into each one depending on your personality. Griffindor for the brave, Slytherin for the ambitious, Ravenclaw for the intelligent, and Hufflepuff for the patient. The kids around me whispered to each other which house they wanted, wishing each other luck.   
After the song, we were called up one by one alphabetically. I watched the haughty, puff headed girl head to Griffindor. The snooty blonde boy headed to Slytherin (the hat barely touching his head). The twins got separated, Parvati to Griffindor and Padma to Ravenclaw.  
There was a massive hubbub over the choppy haired boy with glasses. He sat with the hat on for quite a long time before it sent him to Gryffindor. Their table erupted like a celebrity had been sent to them rather than a skinny, pale boy with a scar on his forehead.  
“Fay Smith.” The steel-haired woman called out and I took a deep breath before heading up and sitting on the stool.   
The hat was dropped onto my head quickly. I was expecting a few weird things but I wasn’t expecting it to speak to me.  
“Hmmm… You’re another difficult one. Smart yes, but there’s a lot else here.” I realized that no one else could hear it.   
“Can you put me where I will have friends?” I whispered.  
“Friends? But you could do so much more.” It seemed amused. “So be it. HUFFLEPUFF.”   
The last word was shouted to the room.   
The table with students with yellow and black ties cheered and I made my way to them. I was given a seat between two other first years. A handsome older boy smiled at me making me blush. I noticed Professor Sprout amongst the teachers and she raised her glass to me with a smile. I wondered if she somehow knew I’d be in this house.  
The remainder of the students didn’t take long to sort, after the last one sat down the imposing man in the throne stood up and the room fell silent.  
He gave a short speech that was equal parts intriguing and terrifying. He warned of staying away from the forest and a part of the castle. I decided that I’d stay as far from either as I physically could.   
As the man, Professor Dumbledore, ended his speech a banquet the likes of which I’d never seen appeared out of thin air. Mountains of potatoes and vegetables along with huge plates of meat and vegetables just arrived in the brink of an eye.   
“Hey, newbie! You’ll go hungry if you don’t hurry!” Joked an older boy nearby who noticed me sitting wide-eyed.  
I filled my plate twice over before it all disappeared and the puddings arrived. This alone was worth all the anxiety of the day. I’d never felt so full, I was definitely feeling a bit sleepy by the time I’d finished off a big helping of jelly and ice cream.   
I pushed my plate away and sat back to enjoy the moment. The faces around me were friendly and open, I’d spoken to a few of the other first years while we ate and they all seemed genuinely pleased to meet me. I was warm and full and was unlikely to wake to find someone had snuck into my room to dump the contents of the rubbish bin over me while I slept.   
Despite the unaccustomed feeling of belonging I was enjoying there was a prickle of something else. I’d always had a little intuition along with a lot of other stuff and now its icy fingers were trailing down my spine. Just as it did the day Laura was hit by a car or when Matron was robbed on her way home.  
I looked around, looking for the source of this feeling. My eyes landed on one of the teachers. He was a meek-looking man, thin and grey-skinned, wearing an odd turban-like hat on his head. He seemed to be talking to the dark-haired man next to him but somehow I could tell his attention was elsewhere. Like he was looking with another set of eyes, not at me but at someone else.   
I shook myself and decided to ignore it. If anything bad happened they’d surely be able to deal with it here.


	2. Chapter 2

After dinner, we were led by several older children who called themselves ‘prefects’ down numerous flights of stairs. It’s odd to be underground when you’re not used to it but this place was neither dank nor dark.   
We passed a pair of doors that were marked as the kitchen, I could hear a great deal of activity in there and guessed that someone (or something) was doing the dishes that had so suddenly disappeared from the tables upstairs. It was oddly comforting to hear something so normal in such a weird place.   
We were led to what seemed to be a dead-end, a hallway filled with various wooden barrels marked with the school crest.  
One of the prefects called for our attention and drew out her wand. She tapped a couple of the barrels to a particular beat and the wall opened.   
We headed inside and my gasp of joy was matched by the dozen or so other first years. This was our ‘common room’ the prefect said. It was beautiful. A great round room with round windows up high that were inexplicably allowing sunlight to flow into the room filling it with a golden glow. The space was dominated by a huge fireplace, the mantel carved with badgers rearing up on either side of the cheerful flames. There were huge squashy sofas and chairs everywhere and the tan yellow walls were painted with curling trailing flowers and vines. There were plants everywhere and above it, all was a huge portrait of a contented looking woman with round rosy cheeks and sparkling eyes.  
I was so distracted by the room the prefect had to call my name three times before I answered. She didn’t look annoyed though, only a little amused.   
I and the other girls were taken through a huge round door and split into two groups, each with a room shared between four. Now, this I was used to.  
The room was cozy and we each had a four-poster bed, the drapes were golden velvet and matched the covers on the bed. I spotted my trunk and headed for it while the other girls did the same. We were shy of each other at first but that was only to be expected.   
Our school timetables as well as a few other things were on top of the trunk and I took a moment to read over them. We had seven subjects to attend over the week; Transfiguration, Charms, Potions, History of Magic, Defence Against the Dark Arts, Astronomy, and Herbology.   
“Oh! Looks like we’ve all got the same!” One of the girls said and we gathered in the middle of the room to confirm it.   
“I’m Jane.” Introduced a dark-haired girl whose bed was to the left of mine.  
“Petra.” Said one with tawny skin and bright gold hair, her bed was across from mine.  
“Louise.” She had startling blue eyes and mousy brown hair that fell in ringlets down her back. Her bed was to the right of mine.  
“Fay.” I managed and they smiled at me.   
We chatted as we changed into our pajamas. Petra had an older brother in Ravenclaw and Louise a younger sister who would be joining us next year. Jane was from London, Petra was from Dover (although her parents were originally from Barcelona) and Louise was from Cardiff. They had no idea where the town I was from was, even when I described it.  
“I never was good at geography. Hey does this mean we don’t have maths class?” Louise was muggle-born like me. We bonded briefly over the difference between Hogwarts and Muggle Schools. Petra and Jane looked aghast when we told them about Maths and PE.  
“You mean you actually went running around in shorts in the mud!” Petra was completely disgusted by the idea of playing football, it made us double over in laughter.   
“Well yes. Why? What do you play?” I asked and she grinned, pulling out a magazine from her trunk.  
“Quidditch!” She (occasionally helped by Jane) spent a happy twenty minutes explaining the game to us. I’ve never been a big sports fan but the way she described it made it sound exciting.  
We’d all started to settle into bed when Petra jumped up. She opened the door and an elegant black cat slunk inside.   
“Lulu! I thought you were staying with Diago!” She scooped up the cat and pressed her face into its fur.  
I listened to it purr and shared a smile with Louise as Petra brought the cat back to her bed where it immediately took up station at the end of the bed.  
We all curled up and the lights dimmed by themselves. One by one I heard the girls fall asleep. Their breathing settling into a gentle rhythm. I couldn’t sleep though, I opened my eyes to find the cat peering at me. Clearly, it could feel, as most animals did, that there was something different about me.  
I slid a hand from under the covers and held it out to the cat, her ears flattened for a moment but she crept forward and jumped onto my bed to sniff at my hand. After a second he began butting her head into my fingers and purring loudly.  
I fell asleep to the sound while she curled up close to me, unwilling to leave my side. 

The morning was a flurry of activity. We dressed and were ushered to the hall where a huge variety of breakfast foods were ready for us to grab. Afterward we were taken on a whirlwind tour of the castle, somewhat derailed as the staircases kept shifting. There was the library, various classrooms, a courtyard, and a quick dash around the grounds before we were deposited at our very first class of the day.  
My very first magic lesson. To say I was nervous would be an understatement.  
It was ‘charms’, a terribly important subject according to Professor Flitwick (an incredibly short man who had to stand on a stack of books at the head of the class). We were each given a large white ostrich feather and instructed to make it float.  
We all produced our wands, though I was hesitant with mine. The girls had talked over breakfast about their experience getting their wands at a special shop. Your wand was meant to choose you. I however had a wand that was never meant for me.  
It was about the length of my forearm, thin and reedy with a knobby handle. It reminded me of a conductor's baton. If you were to ask what it was made from I would never be able to tell you. The only thing I could say is this wand did not like me, not one bit.  
While the others all managed eventually to make their feather float languidly into the air, mine raced around the room like a fluffy rocket and rammed itself into the mortar behind my head so hard it took a great deal of effort to pull out.   
Just my luck, the very first spell I manage to learn and it tries to kill me. Rest in Peace Fay Smith - sadly impaled on a feather.  
Potions was next. Petra had passed on her brother’s warning that the teacher was not to be trifled with. Apparently, Professor Snape was head of Slytherin house and had very little patience for those not under his flag.   
We filed into the dungeon classroom and I instantly fell in love with the subject. There were jars and bottles of every herb and tincture I could think of (as well as hundreds more I couldn’t). I wanted to explore everything but sat at my assigned desk and did my best not to let my mind wander as the, frankly terrifying, teacher stalked around the room giving a somewhat melodramatic speech about his subject.   
He asked a series of quickfire questions and several hands, including my own, shot in the air. All of us were eager to impress him and perhaps earn some of the coveted house points we’d been told about that morning.   
“Well, it seems most of you have done the required reading. Good, you’ll need it if you want a chance of passing this class. But tell me, does anyone know of the uses for a plant called ‘Armoise’?” He stood, arms crossed and eyebrows raised, surveying the room full of blank faces.  
A memory stirred and I raised my hand tentatively.  
“Yes, you.” He pointed at me and I swallowed.  
“Yes, sir. Isn’t that another name for Mugwort or Wild Wormwood?” My voice quavered but the merest ghost of a smile flickered across his face.  
“Indeed. And what would you use it for?”  
“It can be used to make cures for stomach problems and a cream to help heal scarring.” I squeaked. Another ghost of a smile.  
“Hmph. Anything else?” He was testing me now, trying to make me fail.  
“And as an ingredient in various mood-altering potions. Though if used too much it can cause mania.” My voice was a little stronger this time.  
He uncrossed his arms and stalked towards me, I had to stop myself from cowering.   
“Very good, Miss?”  
“Smith, sir. Fay Smith.” He leaned over the desk to search my face as if looking for something familiar.  
“Miss Smith here has gone beyond the required reading, this is what you need to do to become a master of potions. You have impressed me, a rare thing. Ten points to Hufflepuff.” With that he wheeled away and continued the lesson, he didn’t call on me again. That was a good thing as it gave me time for my heart to slow down.   
On our way to the hall for lunch, several of my classmates congratulated me on getting the points from Snape, apparently, it was nearly unheard of for someone, let alone someone not from Slytherin, to get any points from him in the first year at all.  
We passed the great hourglasses filled with gems that represented the points for each house. I looked at the glimmering yellow gems in ours and smiled to myself. Proud of myself for the first time in a long time.   
After lunch, we had our first free period of the week. I decided to retrace the tour so I could find my way around a little easier. After wandering through the castle I found myself on the main grounds. It was a little chilly today so there weren't many other students around. I could see the great ‘forbidden’ forest that started at the edge of the main grounds but kept my distance. I had no reason to doubt the headmaster's warning and had no intention of dying on my first day. I sat by the lake under a huge old willow and pulled a sticky bun I’d hidden from lunch out of my pocket.   
After a few bites there was a flutter of wings and the largest Raven I’ve ever seen landed nearby, eyeing me up cautiously. We regarded each other for a moment.  
“Good Afternoon.” I greeted and it let out a squark, hopping from foot to foot. “Would you like some of my bun?”  
It sidled closer and I pulled a sizable chunk off and held it out to the bird. It gripped it carefully in its beak and once I let go it backed off quickly.   
It bowed low to me, spreading its wings and lowering its head before flying away. I watched it go, smiling as it swooped down to a set of trees near the castle where several other ravens appeared to me waiting.   
“Well, I’ll be!” I turned, shocked out of my thoughts. “I’ve never seen Ol’ Reg so polite before.”  
I turned to see the giant man who led us to the boats last night. He’d been introduced as Hagrid, the gamekeeper. He was a kindly looking man though he had a huge drooling dog at his side that was easily twice my size.  
“Ravens are smart, you just have to treat them with respect,” I said and he hummed in response.  
“Do yer now?” He looked amazed and a little incredulous. “I’ll keep that in mind.”  
I got up and brushed myself off, politely telling him goodbye and heading back to the castle. He was kind and seemed to be a good man as far as anyone had told me, but I could feel something there. He was guilty about something and I had no desire to get involved with such things.   
I thought about looking up what I could do, to put a name to it but I already had an inkling. The doctors had called it instinct or being observant. Matron had sent me to the doctors after I seemed to know everything that was going on around me, whether I’d witnessed it or not.  
I learned to keep it in but animals could always tell. It was like I smelled different or something. When you spend your life marked as a freak, a loser, a nobody, the last thing you want is for people to yell anything else. In my experience throwing words is a precursor to throwing stones.  
As if to prove my point a small money spider landed on my shoulder as I walked into the castle. I held out my hand and it shuffled on, understanding perfectly what I wanted and absolutely willing to do it. I set it down on a windowsill and continued on my way.   
I was so preoccupied on my way back to the common room I turned a corner without looking and cannoned into a group of boys headed in the opposite direction. I rebounded off one of them and landed on my butt on the cold flagstones.  
The boy and his friends seemed to be led by the spoiled blonde boy from the train. He laughed riotously at my accidental pratfall and the others followed suit. I blushed from my head to my toes, gathered myself up and nearly ran from them.   
I suppressed my shameful tears long before I got to the common room. After a couple of deep breaths in the floral-scented room I felt better and headed for one of the armchairs to take a look at the homework we’d been given. It was fairly empty in the common room so I managed to get a lot done before it filled up after class. Flitwick had asked that we look up the ‘Locamotor’ spell and note the movements required. After looking at it I was a bit worried, the wand stuffed in my pocket seemed very powerful and I could feel that it didn’t want me to use it. Snape had asked for several inches worth of parchment on where to find, and the uses of ‘Salix’. I had smiled to myself when he set it. ‘Salix’ was another name for Willow and I already knew what it was for. I looked it up regardless, in case I was wrong but the book confirmed my thoughts.   
By the time I joined my classmates for dinner I’d already finished. Most of the difficulty had come from learning to use the quill rather than the muggle pens I was used to.  
At dinner, Petra complained bitterly about already having homework but a boy in our house had already realized the solution, he figured out I already knew the answer and was trying to force me to tell him.   
“Come on! I know you must already know! You knew what that stuff in class was instantly! I’ll give you my desert!” He kept hounding me and quickly several of the others joined in until a prefect told them off.  
“Look, the point of homework is you find out for yourself. I’m sure she’d be willing to help but you can’t go copying her answers.” He reasoned and they deflated, still looking at me imploringly.  
“Ummm… It’s a tree.” I said and they all looked a little brighter.   
“There now. You’ve got somewhere to start.” He smelled at me and I blushed, hunching down and letting my long fringe fall over my face to hide me a little. “If they do that again come, find me, okay?” I blushed even harder and peered at him through the chestnut-colored curtain.   
“Okay.” I squeaked and he left.  
The girls teased me a little over my response but being lightly teased at reacting to a (somewhat handsome) older boy defending you was significantly better than being hounded to give them my homework.   
We sat in the common room later and I dutifully steered the others to the correct answer from the book which earnt me some thanks as well as a small handful of sweets that I would likely hoard till doomsday.   
I sat back in a chair by the fire and in the warmth and safety of the common room my mind drifted slightly. I didn’t normally let myself do this, it was overwhelming to let the world in when you felt it so viscerally. I could feel the anxiety of some of the other students, just fear of failing their new classes or losing friends. Contentment from the kitchens nearby and excitement from a few third years sat nearby who were chatting about Quidditch.   
I was content to sit there and feel the world around me as it moved. I knew the range of my perception, it was pretty far but the further I stretched the more I could hear and it could be deafening.   
Something caught my attention, a sharp point of pain and panic in the distance.   
Without hesitation I turned to it, unthinkingly pushing to my limit. I felt whatever was in pain die in the dark full of anger and panic.  
I jolted upright.  
“Whoah! You alright, Fay?” Louise looked up. “You fell asleep on us.” She smiled warmly and I tried to return it.  
“Just a bad dream. I should head to bed, it’s been a long day.” I got up and did as I said. I felt deathly cold despite the warmth of my pajamas and the covers around me.   
Whatever died in the dark outside was killed by something brutal, I was starting to understand why the forbidden forest was forbidden.


	3. Chapter 3

The next day was much like the first, classes and meals and homework. I’d failed dismally in Transfiguration despite my best efforts. The water goblet we’d been given to turn into a rat had grown eight dozen teeth and attempted to latch onto my arm. Astrology was better if a little boring and the ghost (yes the teacher was a ghost) who taught History of Magic could put anyone to sleep.  
I went for another walk on the grounds after lunch, Louise and Jane joined me and we were happy enough walking around the green fields.  
“Hey! Let’s go look at the forest!” Louise said and started towards the treeline.   
“Wait!” I called her but Jane just shrugged and followed after her. I did too, despite my fear.   
“Wow!” She stood by the edge of the forest, peering into the trees as we joined her.   
“We shouldn’t be here,” I said, my voice hushed. Now I was closer I could feel it, an aura of wrongness. Something in there didn’t want humans in the forest at all, I was happy to let it have its way.  
“Oh come on, it's not like we’re actually in the forest. I just want to look.” Louise flashed me a bright smile, she was getting annoyed with me. She was used to getting her way it seemed, I sighed and looked into the woods myself.   
I saw a flicker of movement, far off.  
“There!” Jane pointed. “Did you see that?”   
“I’ll bet it was a centaur!” Louise said and they began bickering about the rumor that centaurs lived in the woods.  
“It was probably just a squirrel,” I added and they both huffed at me.  
“Where’s your sense of adventure?” Louise crossed her arms.  
“I guess I don’t have one.” I shrugged. It was true, I didn’t generally wander off the beaten path and preferred to watch and wait to darting into anything.   
“Well, I say it was a centaur!” She turned and started to stomp back up to the castle. Jane gave me an apologetic look and followed her.  
I spared one last glance into the woods before I went after them. It’s one thing to think something is watching you. I knew that there was something, several somethings, watching us from the dark beneath the trees. 

The remainder of the week passed quickly once we fell into a routine. The only exception being a ripple of excitement about the famous potter boy. He’d somehow gotten to be on the quidditch team despite the limitations on first years. Some tosh about showing unbelievable skill on a broom the very first time he flew.   
In my first flying lesson, I just about managed to hover before the broom gave up and fell to the ground. I wasn’t the only one, luckily. It seemed all the muggle-born kids were equally unsteady in the air.   
Herbology was a joy. Professor Sprout was an enthusiastic, if loud, teacher and I earned another five points for my house by knowing what kind of mulch was best to feed various herbs.   
Defence Against the Dark Arts was a different matter. Professor Quirrel was a twitchy middle-aged man who appeared to be afraid of his own shadow. He described the truly awful things that could happen if someone were to meet a practitioner of the dark arts and then set us homework to find and name the crimes of three of them. I found it difficult to concentrate in his class as it always felt like he was looking in odd corners as if something was about to pounce on him. That level of anxiety made me jumpy by the end of class.   
I did my best to keep myself busy. If I was preoccupied with my schoolwork I didn’t notice the crackling stormclouds of emotion around me. It was getting harder and harder not to let it in through.   
It wasn’t until October that things started to turn bad. I was sat in the library with Louise, Jane, and a few other students when the conversation turned to Christmas. The girls all talked excitedly about their family's plans while I did my best to stay silent.  
“What about you, Fay? You never talk about your family.” Louise was smiling and the other girls just looked politely curious. I pressed my nails into my palms and swallowed.  
“Um… I don’t have one.” I said with a dry throat. I felt their attention sharpen and focus on me. Not good.   
“Wait? You mean you’re an orphan?” A Ravenclaw girl spouted, I couldn’t remember her name but I wished she would shut up. I almost made her shut up in fact.  
“Yes.” I looked at my shoes.  
“Wait, that's why all your clothes are so old and your wand sucks!” She added. She was smart, all Ravenclaws are, but tact was not her forte.   
“Yes, there’s a fund for people like me.”  
“Hey, let’s talk about something else.” Jane piped up but the others ignored her. Their questions came thick and fast.  
“So you were at a Muggle orphanage?”  
“What happened to your parents?”  
“Are they dead?”  
“Do you really not have a family at all?”  
I shrank down smaller and hid behind my hair. I was being bombarded by words and feelings. Pity being the loudest, though there was a fair bit of disgust mixed in that made my stomach turn.  
“I-” I began but Jane put her hand on my arm to stop me. It was like an anchor in a storm, she didn’t pity me, she cared.  
“Guys! Can’t you see you’re upsetting her? Leave it.” She said and I swallowed.  
“It's okay.” I sniffed. “I grew up in a place called St Barts, it's a children's home. I don’t know anything about my parents really my-” I stopped but thought it better just to keep going. Jane squeezed my arm gently. “My mother was hit by a car when she was pregnant with me. I survived, she didn’t. They had no idea who she was, no name or anything. No one came forward to claim me.”  
“Wow! Uh, sorry to hear that.” Louise said and the others mumbled their sympathies as well. Almost all of them were insincere, they were brutally fascinated and wanted to know more. They were greedy for the details of my sad little life.  
I decided to finish studying for the day and head back, Jane offered to come with me and she did her best to cheer me up.   
By the time the others joined us in the common room, it was like the awkward moment had never happened at all. I was glad to get it off my chest and that those around me hadn’t made a big deal of it.  
I’m naive sometimes.  
The very next day while I was eating my breakfast I was hit in the back of the head by a sausage. When I turned I saw a group of Slytherin students giggling madly.   
“Why don’t you cry to your mum? Oh, wait!” One shouted at me. I froze.  
Someone had told everyone about my mother.  
I got up and grabbed my bag. I was stopped before I could leave as a gang of students, seemingly led by the blonde snob (who I now knew to be Draco Malfoy) who smirked at me, self-satisfied spite rolled off him in waves.   
“What’s wrong? Scared everyone will know about your mum?”   
“Leave it Malfoy!” A call across the room.  
“Shut it, Weasley!” He shouted back. “We’re just talking, aren’t we, Smith? But that might not even be your real name!” He laughed and the others all echoed him. “It could be anything. Grim or Dim or... Scum!” He looked so pleased with himself. “That's it isn’t it. I bet your real name is Scum!” Another laugh rippling through the group.  
I pushed past without a word.   
“See ya later, Scum!” He called to me as I left.   
After that, the whole of Slytherin called me ‘Scum’. Even some of the Ravenclaws thought it was funny and some of the dimmer students started to believe it was my real name.   
I only shared two classes with Draco. Charms and Transfiguration. Of course, they were the ones that I did worst at because of my dreadful wand.   
Every lesson I had to ignore muttered insults and jabs and afterward they’d follow me down the halls until I got to my next lesson or they lost interest.  
By the end of the month, they’d ground me down to numbness. I went to class, I ate, I did my homework and I slept. I didn’t go to the ravens unless I was sure I wasn’t being followed.   
On Halloween, I finally lost my temper. I think Draco was getting tired of not getting a reaction out of me anymore and pushed it further than he should.   
It was after Charms class, the last lesson of the day and I left the classroom with my usual tail of Slytherin tormentors. Draco pushed to the front, a look of triumph on his face. He stepped into my path and I braced for the onslaught, I could almost see the shape of his thoughts in the air between us.  
“What does it feel like, Scum, knowing your mother hated the idea of having you so much she killed herself?” I looked into his face then, his smirking, bright-eyed face. The world fell away, it was only him and me there.  
I dropped my bag (the strap had been broken weeks ago by one of them) and lunged for him. He shouted as I tackled him then when we hit the ground I began to punch, smack, pull twist, any way I could think to hurt him I was doing.   
“ENOUGH!” A bellow from along the hall as two teachers intercepted us and a prefect pulled me off Draco.  
Snape hauled Draco to his feet and McGonagall stood aghast at the situation.  
“I don’t believe this! Fighting in the halls like neanderthals! What have you got to say for yourselves!” She shouted. That's when Slytherin house closed ranks.  
“It was her, miss!”  
“She just pounced on him, miss!”  
“Everyone knows she’s a nutter, miss!”  
“Draco didn’t do anything, miss!”  
Draco just stood looking for all the world like the victim. I didn’t object, I didn’t say anything in fact.   
“That’s not true! I heard him say something about her mum!” Jane piped up, her voice was distant. There was a small chorus of agreement.  
“That’s enough. Regardless of what Mr Malfoy may have said, that is no excuse for attacking him.” Snape interjected and McGonagall rubbed her face.   
“Fifty points from Hufflepuff and you shall have detention every night for the next month. Do you understand Miss Smith?” She said to me. I’d kept my eyes on Draco the entire time and he gave me a badly hidden smirk, as if to say ‘I won’.  
“Yes, Professor. I understand.” I said, turning to her.  
“Very well, follow me.” She stalked off and I grabbed my bag to follow her.  
“Bye Scum.” I heard Draco whisper after me. I had to stop myself from hitting him again.   
She led me to her classroom where she told me to sit. I was to complete 1000 lines saying ‘I will not fight’ that night and every night thereafter.   
I sat down and pulled out a length of parchment to start working. I’d just about gotten halfway and my hand was starting to cramp when She stood up and approached me.   
“I need to go and make sure the Halloween festivities are going smoothly. I will bring you back a plate of food. You are to stay here until I return. Do you understand?” Her face was a little softer now. I’d accepted my punishment with no fight and would fulfill it with no argument at all. I supposed that made her inclined to believe this was an out of character occurrence.   
“Yes, Professor,” I replied and she nodded before leaving me there.  
I chose to use her absence to take a break. I flexed my fingers and massaged my hand. There was a small cut on one of the knuckles where I’d hit him and caught on one of his buttons.   
The window was open and now the sun had gone down the breeze was chilly. I got up to close it, figuring that the Professor wouldn’t mind. As I reached for the window there was a flurry of feathers and there sat one of the ravens.  
It bowed then let out a sharp call that echoed around the room, making me jump. It didn’t need to say anything really as I understood. Fear was emanating from it like a beacon. It was warning me that something was wrong. That there was danger nearby.  
It took off into the night and I shut the window in a hurry.   
I sat back down and tried to process what it had told me. It didn’t take long before I heard screams and running feet outside the classroom.   
I was torn. I may well be safe where I am and yet whatever the danger is might be right outside the door, about to break in.  
I knew the second the danger was known. A wave of collective terror washed over the castle like a tidal wave. I was paralyzed by it.   
I gripped the desk in front of me and tried to keep it out, to hold up a shield against the onslaught of panic that was being pulled to me as lightning was to a lightning rod.  
I could feel tears running down my face and focus on my breathing. It hurt and I just wanted it to stop so I did my best to find something, someone who was not afraid so that I could latch onto them like a leech and use their mind to calm myself.  
There. In the middle of it all, one mind that was not full of horror. It was cold, so cold it almost hurt but it was calm.   
I can’t hear thoughts but I can feel intentions and whoever this was did not intend anything good. Once I’d refined control of myself I found myself strangely fascinated by their fluctuating emotions. Self-satisfaction giving way to anger then a creeping dark joy.   
I’d never felt anything like it. This person had something missing, a bit of their mind, or maybe their soul. If I had to name it it was easy to name. Evil. Complete and utter unadulterated evil.   
I flinched and realized as I did that it felt me there. Anger and curiosity flared in it and I scrambled away back into the miasma of distress that filled the building. I swallowed and wiped my face, alone in the classroom.  
It saw me as I saw it. Not a face nor a voice but I knew if I encountered it again I would know it.  
I started to continue the lines, if I focused on the movement, on the ink and the words it was easier to block everything out. I will not fight. I will not fight. I will not fight. I will not fight.  
It was over an hour before Professor McGonagall returned. She was full of apologies for leaving me there. She explained what had happened and I nodded distantly.  
Someone had let a troll into the castle. She said it had found its own way in but I had no doubt that someone had done it on purpose. The troll was not the being I’d felt. From what I’d read trolls are little more than animals themselves.  
No, the mind I’d felt was a person.   
I wanted to tell the Professor. To sound the alarm but what could I do? What in the world could I say? Oh by the way I’m an empath and I felt the touch of pure evil tonight, you might want to check on that. No one would believe me.   
I was dismissed and trudged back to the common room, there were still students milling about. When I got to the room Petra was determined to be the one to tell me about what had happened. Louise and Jane added to the story and I just nodded.   
When they ran down and we finally got into bed I pulled the covers up and over my head, safe in the dark and warmth I tried to block out the events of the day. I would suffer the consequences of my confrontation with Malfoy for some time I would imagine and as for the entity I’d felt this evening, I didn’t like to think about what that meant.


	4. Chapter 4

As I suspected a fair few of my housemates were upset at me for losing fifty points for them but surprisingly, having heard what happened from Jane and several others, most of them were on my side.   
Word even spread to the other houses, I had at least four Gryffindor students congratulate me on giving Malfoy ‘A well-deserved beating’ as well as nods of encouragement from most of Ravenclaw as well. It seemed despite his popularity in his own house, Malfoy was not well-liked amongst the other students.   
It was strange but I actually felt guilty for attacking him. I’m not by nature a violent person and I felt awful that I had succumbed to such as base instinct. I decided that to clear my conscience I needed to apologize.   
Maybe having seen what real evil looks like I saw Malfoy for what he was, a petty little boy desperate for attention. Or maybe I just wanted to put it behind me. Or maybe I’m just a soft-hearted idiot.  
On Monday morning I headed to Charms with a plan. It was a little bit devious and required using a little bit of manipulation, not usually something I liked but it was needed.   
I sat down as usual with Jane to my right and Scott (the boy who’d been so adamant I help him with his homework) to my left. I got out my quill and ink then sat back and focused on Professor Flitwick. He was busy with something on his desk so it was relatively easy to do what I needed.  
Just like with animals I can make people do what I want. I don’t like doing it. It's hard and feels wrong but just occasionally, like today, I can influence someone's actions. I plant ideas in their head and they act like it's their own, it's easier if they are distracted and even easier if it is something they might have thought to do on their own.   
I felt the idea settle into place in his head then withdrew my influence.   
“Good Morning Class!” He said, turning to us as the last student sat down. “I’ve been made aware that there’s been some tension between students after my classes.” Malfoy chuckled at that and flashed me a look, I’d split his lip and given him a bruise under one of his eyes but he still seemed satisfied with his actions.  
“So I’ve been thinking and I have an idea of how to foster a bit more camaraderie!” Flitwick looked so pleased with himself despite the barely contained groans from the students. “Now now I’m just swapping your seating around a little, no need to be upset. Now let's see-”  
He began calling names and having the students swap. I was called to swap with the bulky boy that was always in Malfoy’s shadow, Gregory Goyle, which sat me right next to Draco who sneered at me. His other henchman was replaced by Darrell from my house who immediately started talking to the Slytherin girl next to him.  
“Great, trapped between scum and a mudblood.” Draco muttered, crossed his arms, and sat back with a sour look on his face.   
“Good! Now today we’re going to be looking a bit more into the ‘Reparo’ charm. I’m going to hand out some things and working together I want you to see if you can fix them.” Flitwick said as he began to give out various broken things. I was handed a wristwatch with a cracked face and Draco was given a broken cup.  
“So stupid,” Draco muttered pulling out his wand.  
Soon the class was busy, cries of ‘Reparo!’ coming from here or there.  
“Draco,” I said softly and he sneered at me.  
“What, Scum?”   
“I want to apologize.” I kept my eyes on the desk but I could see his surprise.  
“You what?”  
“I want to apologize, for hitting you. I shouldn’t have lost my temper like that.”   
“Wait, you’re apologizing to me?” I turned to him then and met his eye, he was caught between confusion and anger.   
“Yes.”  
“Even though I said that about your mum?” He looked incredulous and obviously didn’t trust me so I did what I would do with a frightened animal and let my instincts take over. When I let go of control I know I give off emotional energy of my own. It’s potent and others respond to it pretty quickly. I let him feel my sincerity.   
“Yes, there’s no excuse for getting violent with you. I’m sorry.” I say and it seems to sink in at last.   
“Oh.” He turned back to the desk and didn’t say anything else for the rest of the lesson.  
I managed to partially repair the glass face of the watch though the wand once again resisted my attempt to use it. I sighed and put it away in my pocket as I packed up my things and headed to Potions class. For the first time in a month, I wasn’t accompanied by catcalls or tripping feet. I hoped this meant that my plan worked.   
I hated to do things like that but no harm was done and the only thing that anyone could accuse me of is being a little manipulative. Not exactly a crime.   
I tried to stop someone from bullying me once by doing what I can do. I had to be so forceful I actually made the poor girl very ill. If someone really wants to do something, forcing them to do otherwise is very hard and can have lasting damage. She recovered and resumed her wicked ways quite quickly once I stopped trying to bend her mind the other way. To stop someone from doing something you have to make them think it’s their idea to stop, it’s harder but better for everyone.   
I just hoped it had worked this time. Before he’d stalked off with his cronies I’d picked up the slightest hint of something in his emotions. Curiosity.   
I was tired during potions but was happy to find that Snape chose not to victimize me for attacking one of his house members. He didn’t acknowledge me at all during the class but that was better than how he treated some of the other students, that is with outright disdain.   
Jane told me during lunch that she was sure I and Draco would have been tearing lumps out of each other during Charms. I laughed and said it would be a long time before I hit anyone again.   
Petra was mooning over one of the older boys and conversation soon turned to gently teasing her over that. She blushed and swatted at us with her napkin but she wasn’t hurt by our mocking, I was starting to like these girls. Jane had defended me fiercely and Petra was just fun. Louise however had begun to drift away and seemed to prefer sitting at the Slytherin table during meals.   
No prizes then for guessing who spread the news about my mother.   
That evening I could feel the guilt and shame she was feeling as I returned from my detention. I’d just showed up, done my lines, and left, Professor McGonagall and I barely spoke and she was actually fairly quiet company.   
Petra whispered to me that Louise was feeling awful about telling a Slytherin about me. Apparently, she’d done it to impress one of the girls but when they found out she was Muggle-born she was immediately rejected. I wondered if she’d still feel bad had they accepted her.  
Still, I tried to include her in our conversation as we got ready for bed and she seemed to lighten up before we turned the lights out. 

Transfiguration was fast becoming my least favorite class. Every time I attempted even the most basic spell my wand backfired. I sat desperately trying to turn a match into a needle. Every time something different would happen. The match would burst into flame, multiply so there were a hundred of them, grow in size, shrink, change color. Anything except turning into a needle.  
I sat in the corner away from the others as I was so behind, holding back tears as once again my attempt at the spell failed. This time it turned into a small while daisy and wilted into dust before my eyes.   
“Still failing, eh Scum?” I looked up into the grey-green eyes of Malfoy and instantly wished I could disappear.  
“Yes,” I said, gritting my teeth. I turned away and noticed that McGonagall had disappeared. Most of the rest of the class here paying attention to Darrell who was being menaced by Crabe and Goyle.  
“Tell you what, you help me and I’ll help you. How about it?” That smirk was still there though I felt less of his usual distaste as he stood there.  
“What do you want?”  
“Word is you’re the very best at potions. You let me copy your homework and I’ll help you with that.” He pointed at the ruined remains of a dozen attempts at the spell.  
“I’ll help you with your homework, not copy. Snape would know if you did, anyway.” I reply and he puffs out his cheeks.   
“Deal.” He offered his hand and I took it briefly to shake it.   
My abilities are magnified by touch and I felt no lie in him, no intent to hurt me.   
“Good, meet me in the library at lunch.” He said before flicking a broken matchstick off the desk and wandering off.   
I spent the entirety of Astrology class trying to concentrate rather than worry about meeting Draco but when we were dismissed for lunch I headed straight there, no way I could eat with this much anxiety running through me.   
I found a seat towards the back and decided to get a head start on my Astrology homework, with me evenings taken up by detention I needed to make sure I kept up with everything. I’d completed my Potions homework yesterday during my free period so at least I had that done.   
“Ah, here you are.” Draco found me just as I finished taking a few notes. He sat down next to me but kept his distance. It was clear this was a business arrangement, nothing more. It surprised me he was alone though.  
“Where are your bodyguards?” He let out a sarcastic laugh.  
“They never miss lunch.”  
I pulled out my potions book rather than say anything that could strain this already tenuous truce we had.   
“Just to check, what was your homework assignment?” I ask as I flip through the pages.  
“Something about ‘eye of newt’.” He leaned back in his chair, giving an air of indifference.   
“Good, just checking he gave us the same. Here this is what you need.” I hold out the book to him and he takes it and looks at it carefully.  
“Mustard? What are you on about?” He tosses the book onto the desk in front of me.  
“‘Eye of newt’ is an old name for mustard seed. Look, do you want my help or not?” I snap the book closed and put it back in my bag.  
“Ugh! Yes, I need your help. So its mustard seed, anything else I need to know?” He sits up and pouts at me.  
“Remember to put the dangers of it. Mainly heart failure and drowsiness okay.” I say and he nods.  
“Good.”  
“You’re not going to write it down?” I roll my eyes.  
“I’ll remember it, I’m not dumb you know.” He crosses his arms and I sigh.  
“Fine, I’ll write it down.” I pull out a small strip of parchment and an old pen from my bag and write down what I told him.  
“What's that?” He points at the old beaten up biro.  
“A pen, it's just like a quill but smaller and you don’t need an inkwell.” I finish writing and offer it to him.  
“I don’t want that mudblood trash!”   
“Take it or leave it, I did my bit.” I offer it again and he snatches it away, putting it quickly into one of his pockets. “Now can you help or not?”  
“With what?” He smirks, of course, he’s going to make me work for it.  
“Draco, if you’re messing with me I’m happy to give you another bruise to match that one.” An empty threat and I think he knows that.  
“Here.” he throws a match onto the desktop, and then pulls out his wand.   
I grit my teeth assuming he’s going to show me the spell thatI’ve had demonstrated a hundred times. Instead, he offers the wand to me.   
“What?”  
“Try my wand, then you’ll know if it’s you or that busted up thing doing it wrong.” He holds it out to me. I take it with a shaking hand and point it at the match. I whisper the incantation and a tiny spark shot from the wand to the match which jumped in the air.   
We both watched it as it cartwheeled and landed point embedded into the wood. It had turned entirely into a silvery needle.   
“I- I- I did it!” I breathed, a smile growing across my face. I turned to the smug-looking boy beside me. “I really did it!”  
“Thought so, that broken-down old thing you’ve been using is the reason you’re failing, dummy.” He smiled too, a sincere smile, the first I’d ever seen on his face. He was pleased it had worked and a little pleased he’d helped me. “You should get a new one.”  
“Oh.” My smile faded and I handed him back his wand. “Thank you Draco, it’s good to know it really wasn’t my fault.”  
“Hey. What’s wrong? I thought you were happy.”   
I put away my books and pen before standing up and stepping past him.  
“I am. I hope your homework goes well.” I walk away, he calls after me but I keep walking.   
I was not going to admit, to him or in fact to anyone ever again that I was utterly penniless.   
I knew that most wands cost at least 5 galleons. I don’t know how I would ever afford that, let alone the money to get to Diagon Alley to buy one.   
I sat on a bench not far from my next class and looked at my shoes. Second-hand socks in second-hand shoes. Nearly everything I had was second hand or older. It was hard enough back at St Bart's but at least I had everything I needed there.  
Now I was stuck with a wand that guaranteed that I would fail at least two of my classes and never really succeed at being a witch. The unfairness threatened to overwhelm me.  
I sat through History of Magic, staring out the window and paying little to no attention to the droning ghost by the board. I know my mood was affecting the class as they all seemed grumpy and listless as well, or more so than usual for this class. Even Potter and his friends sat a few rows back were muttering irritably at each other.  
I left the class and headed straight to my room to leave my stuff. I needed to grab dinner quickly and then head to detention. Jane and Petra barely had time to ask what was wrong before I shot by them, back out the door.   
I was still agitated by the time I reached McGonagall's room again. I sat and did my lines as instructed but she kept looking up at me, I suppose it was obvious I was upset.   
“Miss Smith. I understand you do not wish to be here but anger will not help.” She snapped at me after a half-hour of me scribbling moodily.  
“I’m sorry, Professor, I’m just distracted. I’ll get this done and head off as soon as I can.” I didn’t look at her as I spoke.   
“Very well, carry on.”   
Another half hour and I was at least two-thirds done when she slammed her teacup down, making me jump.   
“Oh! I can’t seem to concentrate this evening!” She snapped, rubbing the bridge of her nose.   
I chose not to comment, my mood was affecting hers badly and I needed to get away before she got too angry.   
At last, I finished and she dismissed me quickly. Once out of the classroom and into the cooler air I felt a little better. By the time I’d gotten back to the common room I was able to laugh a little at the way I’d been acting.   
“Hi! What’s been bugging you today?” Petra was sat on her bed with Lulu, leafing through a magazine as I walked in.  
“Nothing really, something stupid.” I sat on my bed and pulled out my ponytail, shaking out my hair and running my fingers through it.   
“Was it Malfoy? He’s definitely something stupid.” That got us both laughing.  
“Not really.” I sighed, lying back on the bed. “I just really need a new wand, this one hates me and I’ll never pass Charms or Transfiguration with it.”  
“So you mean you didn’t mean to turn that mouse into a yellow blob?” She joked and I hummed in response. That yellow blob had been very acidic too, there would be a burn on the desk I used for the next ten years no doubt. “Why not get a new one during the Christmas break?” When I didn’t answer she sat upright and covered her mouth. “Oh, Fay! I’m sorry! I just-”  
“No, it’s okay.” I don’t sit up, I just let my eyes rest on the ceiling above me.   
“I could lend you the money if you want?”   
“No. Thank you.” I try to be firm. “I don’t want anyone's charity or pity. Maybe I can ask Professor Sprout tomorrow, maybe there’s another wand I can use instead.”  
“Hey! Good idea! Ask her after class tomorrow.”  
“Yeah.” I pursed my lips at that, it was a plan at least.


	5. Chapter 5

“A new wand? My dear, what’s wrong with that one?” Sprout was bustling around after our Herbology lesson, putting things away.   
“This one doesn't work very well, Professor. Every spell I cast goes very wrong.” I duck as she tosses a stack of empty seed packets over her shoulder.  
“Just because you can’t cast the spell correctly doesn't make it the wand’s fault young lady!” She turned and handed me a stack of plant pots, directing me over to the corner.  
“Can I just show you? Please?” I beg and she relents.   
I pull out the offending wand and point it at a shard of pottery on the side, with a swish and a flick I cast the levitation spell which was the very first I’d learned.  
The shard shot into the air and smashed through the greenhouse roof making a screeching noise.  
“My word!” She looked up through the little hole it made and put her hands on her hips. “You’re quite right! That wand is no good at all!”  
I slumped and sat on a bench, trying not to cry in relief.   
“I don’t know if there are any other donated wands around. I’ll have to check and let you know. Meanwhile, I’ll have a word with Flitwick and McGonagall, they must have noticed something was wrong anyway.” She urged me out of the greenhouse as she spoke. “I’ll let you know what’s going on by the end of the week. Go on now.”  
She shut the door behind me and I heard the shard of pottery come back to earth somewhere nearby. I stowed the terrible wand back in my pocket and headed dreamily to lunch.  
As I entered the hall a girl called out to me, I turned and saw Louise back in her spot on the Slytherin table.   
“Hey Scum, you back from begging for scraps?” The girl who yelled was Pansy Parkinson, a pretty girl with long dark hair. She turned to Louise after she yelled and they smiled at each other. So much for remorse. “Poor little orphan girl. Can’t even afford a decent wand!”  
I turned and left.   
I spent the rest of the lunch hour walking alone on the grounds. I had no desire to get into another altercation. I was aware I wasn’t the Slytherin’s only victim but that made it no better.   
While Parkinson was nowhere as vicious as Draco she was just as persistent. For the remainder of the week, she would shout insults at me whenever we crossed paths. My saving grace was the boys in her house appeared to think her boring or irritating, it was easy enough to avoid her outside class.  
Louise was another matter though of course, she didn’t realize the implications of her actions. Hufflepuff value nothing more than fair play and her deceit was not sitting well with the rest of the house. She refused to speak to me, blaming me for the others ostracizing her.  
Jane put it best: “She made her bed, let her lie in it.”  
I got word from Sprout on Friday during my detention. I was to be up early the next day when she would take me to Olivanders herself. She needed some things in Diagon Alley so it was nothing to bring me along.   
When I mentioned money she said that funds were taken from the trust for me, on the understanding that I might have to do without something else later.  
I was so excited I could barely sleep and was up and dressed long before the others were even awake. I used the time to finish my homework and was ready waiting at Sprouts office over half an hour early.   
We were traveling by Floo powder, a method that usually didn’t work but had been lifted for our travel today. As instructed I took a pinch of the powder and flung it at my feet with a lightly squeaky shout of where I wanted to go.  
I was enveloped in smoke and emerged from a fireplace into a street I’d never seen before. Sprout appeared behind me and allowed me a moment to take in the sights around me before hurrying me towards a dark old shop with dusty windows.   
“Now you go in. Old Olivander knows about our arrangement, he’ll take that old wand off your hands as part payment as well. I’ll come back to get you as soon as I can so stay here no wandering.” She was as stern as can be but I could tell she was in a good mood.   
It was the first quidditch match of the season this afternoon and she was determined to be back in time.   
I entered the shop and stood at the desk. It was just as dark inside and there seemed to be no one here. I tentatively rang the bell sat on the desk and its atonal trill did little to reassure.  
“Ah! You must be the Smith girl.” An old man, bent and grey, emerged from the room behind the high counter. There were shelves upon shelves filled with little boxes behind him. I supposed they contained wands but how could there be so many, surely I wouldn't have to try them all.   
“Yes, sir.” I bobbed politely and he smiled, peering at me over his spectacles. I pulled out the old wand I’d been using and handed it to him. “Professor Sprout said I should give this to you.”  
He took it and examined it closely.  
“11 inches, hazel with a core of Kelpie hair. I remember. This was the wand of Lucy Fenwick. I heard she passed away a few years ago. Poor woman never got over Benjy’s death.” He was speaking mostly to himself. I shuffled uncomfortably. “Now, I’m told you’re in need of a wand of your own, dear girl.”  
“Yes, sir.” I feel curiosity and little else from him but I’m nervous all the same. I’d rather not answer questions.  
He regards me for a moment then reaches back to grab a box. He pulls out a wand and hands it to me.   
“Try this.” He urges. I swish the wand a little and it gives off a few puffs of smoke. He immediately takes it off me and replaces it with another, rattling off a list of what made it. This time it shot a spark at the pot of ink on his desk which instantly began to boil.   
He gave me another and another to try. One shot flames, another flung itself from my hand and the last gave off a shrill whistle till I gave it back.  
He stood for a moment, tapping his glasses while he thought. I was near tears at this point, convinced that I’d never find the right one.  
“Stay there.” He turned back into his workshop and out of sight. I could hear him muttering and rummaging through something. After a moment he returned with a dust-coated box. He opened it and lifted out a dark colored wand with a trailing design that led halfway up its length.  
“Here. One of my oldest wands. 10 inches, ebony with a dittany core.” He handed it to me and I looked at it, the design was of a plant curing around the length, it had wide flat leaves and made my grip on it comfortable and secure.  
I waved it cautiously and a shower of soft glittering motes flood from the end and filled the air with sparkles.  
“There, girl. That’s definitely yours. I made that half a lifetime ago, I’m glad it found its partner at last.” Olivander was smiling at me and I couldn’t help but return it. Something of my own, just mine, meant for me.  
I couldn’t wait to try it out but Professor Sprout had other ideas. She met me coming out of the shop and filled my arms with bags of seeds and mulch before hustling me back to the castle. I was forced to help her put away her new purchases in the greenhouse before she finally let me go.   
I practically ran out onto the grounds, pointed my new wand at the first stone I saw, and shouted the levitation spell. It floated gently into the air and I whooped loudly, unsettling the ravens on their perch.   
I got some odd looks from some passing fourth years but I didn’t care. I felt great. A weight was lifted. I had a wand I could trust.   
Petra and Jane were almost as excited as me when I got back to the common room and showed them. Darrell sauntered over and, as usual, started talking incessantly. He was apparently an expert on wands and ebony was rare, dittany even more so. Although we had all learned to take what he said carefully. Often he was wrong and even more often he was over exaggerating.   
Everyone in the castle was excited over lunch, after which we headed out to the Quidditch grounds, taking our seats in the Hufflepuff Stands to watch. Darrell decided the best encore to his rant about wands was to explain Quddich to me in great detail. Petra rolled her eyes but I let him talk. It made him happy after all.   
I’ll admit that watching that first match was amazing. The way the players swooped and zoomed around was utterly enthralling. That is until Potter just had to mess it up.   
The electric atmosphere was a wonderful feeling for me, I was willing to just enjoy the ups and downs of the match when there was a shout from the Gryffindor stands. Potter was high in the air above us, I suppose to watch for the coveted snitch but for some reason he was flailing around, desperately trying to keep ahold of his broom.   
Joy turned to fear. If he fell he might not be caught in time. I stared up with everyone, lost to the feelings around me when I noticed it. That cold sharpness I’d felt not too long ago. I froze and I couldn’t breathe. Whoever it was was in the stadium.   
My eyes flicked over the crowd, everyone was looking up of course. Not Hufflepuff. Not Ravenclaw. Not Slytherin or Gryffindor. I turned to the teachers. There.  
Somewhere amongst them was that thing. That darkness that chilled me to the core. I felt its intent. Someone was cursing Potters broom. It wanted to kill him.  
I needed to know who it was so I covered my eyes to reach out properly. Luckily to anyone it just looked like I was scared to see him fall. It was hard with so many people. Fear and panic and (from Slytherin at least) a little amusement filled the world and I had to push through to the source of the cold.   
Just as I reached it there was a flare of pain. I opened my eyes automatically to see Snape jump up, his cloak on fire somehow. He knocked over several teachers in his effort to douse it and the curse stopped. So did the cold.   
It must have been some friend of Potters, they saw someone on the stand muttering a spell and stopped them. Judging by their choice of victim they were fairly sure it was Snape.  
I wasn’t so sure.   
Potter regained himself and spotted the snitch, he caught it in dramatic fashion. He was lucky, anyone else would have knocked out half their teeth by catching it in their damn mouth.  
Later in the common room while several people were recapping the match I sat quietly and thought about what happened. Not too long ago this person let a troll into the castle and it nearly killed someone. Now again they turn up and someone else nearly dies.   
I needed to act before they really did hurt someone. But I needed to be sure.  
Then what? I had the natural ability to make a person jump off a cliff if I wanted it enough. No one would ever accept me if they knew.  
I needed to make, whoever it was show themselves. The question was how.


	6. Chapter 6

I decided I needed to warn Harry, I’m sure he knew he was in danger of course but I’m not sure he registered quite how much danger that was.   
I headed for them as soon as I reached the great hall on Sunday morning. As usual, Harry was huddled up with the youngest Weasley Boy and the ever-charming Miss Hermione Granger. My dislike for her began on the train and continued even now.   
She eyed me suspiciously as I approached.  
“Hi, umm… can I talk to you guys for a moment?” I say and Harry looks surprised. I don’t think I’ve spared two words for him in the months we’ve been in class together.  
“Fay, isn’t it? What do you want?” He was a little sharp but I understood, I knew he was being cautious and I felt his fear. Only yesterday someone had tried to kill him and he was right to be wary.  
“May I sit down?” I pointed at the empty spot next to Harry and they nodded. “Look, what I’m about to say may be a bit… weird but hear me out okay?”  
“Alright.” Hermione sat with her arms crossed and back straight as if she was trying to give off an air of authority.   
“You’ve probably noticed that there are some…” I bit my lip trying to find the right words. “Odd. Things going on, right. I mean a troll gets let into the castle, someone jinxes your broom, there's something on the third floor we’re supposed to be scared of…”  
“Okay, you made your point. Things are weird. So what?” Weasly spoke up, he was looking just as incredulous as his friends but seemed to be getting what I was aiming at.   
“There’s something here.” I lowered my voice and tried to push at them how scared I was. “Something not… right. Something evil. It tried to kill you Harry but that's not why it's here.”  
“It’s after the-” Weasly started but Hermione kicked him under the table.  
“Hush!” She snapped at him.  
“So you already know.” I sigh. “Look. If I can help-”  
“We’re just fine thank you. No need for anyone else sticking her nose in.” Hermione snapped and I looked up from my hands and into her eyes. Fear, distrust, and a lot of jealousy burned in her. She wanted so desperately to be the best, the smartest one.   
I stood up and backed away.  
“Alright. The offer is there if you need me. And Harry-” He looked up at me with big green eyes. “Be careful, whatever it is, and whatever it's after it will kill anyone who gets in its way. And it will enjoy it.”  
I turned away and left the hall. I’d said my piece, if they didn’t want my help then that was fine but that wouldn’t stop me from at least trying.   
With the rest of the day my own I went for a walk through the grounds with a few of my housemates. They were pleasant company and kept me from focusing too much on what was going on. Darell was hyper-focused on Quidditch again but Petra had enough and was having a rather lively discussion with him about it as we found a good spot by the lake to stop and sit down.   
“Are you okay?” Jane asked, sitting next to me. “You seem quiet today.”  
“Just tired. Didn’t get much sleep.” I wrap my arms around my knees and try not to shiver in the November breeze.  
“Me either, that whole thing with that Potter boy was too scary. Imagine if he fell-” She shuddered and I laughed at her being overdramatic.   
“Yeah.”  
“Hey, speaking of, isn’t that him headed to Hagrids again with his little mates?” George pointed out over the field, sure enough, the little trio was headed to the squat gamekeeper's hut on the edge of the grounds.   
“They’re always together, those three,” Petra added.  
“Well aren’t we?” I say with a smile and Jane laughs and links her arm with mine.  
“Very true.” She says and we huddle together, it's nice, warm, and comfortable. A million miles from how I’d felt at the Quidditch match.  
“Yeah well, we’re normal. Not like them.” Darrell said and Petra pushed him playfully.  
“You? Normal?” She cackled and he blushed.   
We all laughed with her and he blushed harder but he wasn’t angry.   
Eventually, the chill sent us back into the castle and we sat in the common room by the fire. I watched as Darell and Geroge threw paper airplanes around the room.   
“Hey, Fay! You want one?” Jane offered me a small purple and gold box with the words ‘chocolate frog’ on it. I took it and thanked her, she always had sweets or chocolate, it was amazing she was as slim as she was.  
I opened it and the enchanted treat inside tried to leap away but got stuck on the back of the chair. As the charm that made it leap faded off Geroge snatched it up and shoved it in his mouth with a cheeky grin!  
“Hey!” I sat up and pouted at him.  
“Sorry, at least you still got the card.” He said though a mouthful of chocolate. I grunted and settled back on my seat.  
I pulled out the card. Nicolas Famell, a fairly common card. I shoved it onto my pocket just in time for Petra to throw a cushion at me. So began an epic pillow battle, lots of other kids joined in and it had to be broken up by a prefect.  
Louise sneaks into our room just before lights out, as usual. One day she’d get caught by Filch and his cat, she spent entirely too much time with the Slytherins. Especially as all I felt from them when she was around was poorly contained disgust. She was like their pet. I often saw them laughing at her but she did her best to deflect their ire onto other students, me for example.  
It was hard as Petra and Jane pretty much ignored her now, I wish I understood what made her so intent on making friends with Pansy Parkinson and the others.   
That amongst many things was not my problem. I had plenty to deal with by myself.

The end of term was fast approaching. With my new wand, I was finally catching up in Charms and Transfiguration, which was a relief. In fact, Professor McGonagall was so happy when at last I turned a water goblet into a rat and back again with no misadventures she awarded me ten house points. Along with those I earned occasionally in Potions and Herbology I’d made back those I lost by the time the last day of term arrived.   
Students had the option of staying at Hogwarts over the Christmas break, not many took it but I did. I had no reason to return to the dreary halls of St Barts any sooner than I needed to.   
Jane and Petra hugged me before they left, promising cards on Christmas day. Darrel and George waved as they headed off as well. Louise said nothing as she scurried away. In all, there were only eleven Hufflepuff Students left and I was the only first year.   
I spent my days in the library, for the most part, getting ahead with my schoolwork and then doing some personal research. Time and time again I looked for someone with my abilities but nothing ever came up. Empaths certainly, those who had an affinity for animals, yep but none that could influence both animals and people. Or read their emotions over such a large distance.   
Christmas came and went without much happening. Petra sent me a whole box of Bertie Bots every flavor beans and jane a pack of three chocolate frogs and a photo of herself and her parents enjoying their skiing holiday. Even Geroge sent me a card. It was nice to have something to open on the day. I shared dinner with the other Hufflepuffs and got a tiny spinning top in my cracker that lit up and sang ‘We Wish You a Merry Christmas’ when it was spun. Compared to the little plastic frog from last year it was spectacular.  
On a chill day just after Christmas, I found I had company in the library for the first time in several days. They obviously thought themselves alone judging by the conversation.  
“Harry, I give up!” I heard him clearly from across the stacks.   
“Come on, you don’t want Hermione to beat us to it do you?”  
“She probably already knows the answer anyway.” I heard a thump that I guessed was the speaker putting their head quite heavily down on top of a book.  
I didn’t need my abilities to know who was talking or to eavesdrop. I just had to stay quiet.   
“Look, we need to find out who Nicholas Flamel is. I had no luck in the restricted section but he has to be here somewhere.”  
“Ugh!” Ron’s muffled voice made me smile.   
A draft wafted over me and I shivered, pushing my hands into my pockets. There, crumpled and a little worn, was the card I’d gotten a while ago. I pulled it out and almost laughed aloud.   
I set it on the desk and pulled out my wand, as softly as I could I charmed the card to waft over the bookshelves and land in front of the boys.  
“Hey! Who threw that!” Came Ron’s voice. I quickly packed my things and headed for the door.  
“Ron, look!” I picked up speed then and if they saw me dash out the door they made no move to chase me.  
I’d helped and that was that. I knew what they knew.  
The philosopher’s stone was here and someone, or something, was desperate to get their hands on it.


	7. Chapter 7

After that, it was a bit easier. If Potter suspected I’d been the one to throw the answer at him he didn’t say anything. If he suspected anyone it was Professor Snape. Whenever he entered the room the outright hate that came off him towards the teacher was almost a solid thing.   
I, however, saw no reason to suspect our potions master. I had the lucky chance that one day, before Christmas break, one of my classmates had spilled something and I’d slipped. Snape had helped me up and in doing so had gripped my wrist. Skin to skin.  
All I’d felt was exasperation. No coldness, no evil.   
Same with McGonagall, she shook my hand when I completed my transfiguration spell and all I felt was triumph. That left Flitwick, Sprout, Hooch, Hagrid, and a few others. I didn’t rule out the Headmaster but it seemed unlikely that he hid the stone in his own school only to want it himself.   
So all I had to do was find a way to test each of the staff to find out if they were in fact a murderous dark wizard, hell-bent on immortality. Plus I had to do that while still going to class and getting decent grades and not revealing to the world that I can see exactly what they are feeling and intend to do at all times. No big deal.  
A week into the new term and I’d managed to scratch Madam Hooch off my list, albeit accidentally (I fell off my broom and she caught me). However, I had no idea how to get a good look at the others.   
I was pondering this in Charms, I was absent-mindedly lighting and dousing my wand while I was thinking.   
“Hey, Scum.” Draco had yet to stop calling me by that insipid nickname.  
“Yes?”   
“I need a bit of help with my homework again. You willing?” He was keeping his voice low but he needn’t bother. No one would hear him over Darell’s incessant chattering.   
“Really? Why should I?” I doused the light at the end of my wand and turned to him, he looked a little uncomfortable.  
“I’ll make it worth your while.” He mumbled and I had to say I was intrigued.  
“Alright. I’ll see you at lunch.” I huffed and he gave me another smug grin.  
I sat in the same spot as last time. I was less nervous this time. I was used to helping my classmates with tier homework, as long as he was polite about it I may as well help Draco too.  
“Here you are.” He appeared earlier than last time, alone again.  
“Crabbe and Goyle off stuffing their faces again?”  
“Yup.” He sat down as before then seemed at a slight loss. “Did you have a good Christmas?” I was surprised but guessed he was just trying to win me over so I’d help him.  
“I was here.” He nodded slowly. “Did you?”  
“I got a new broom and loads of other stuff. What did you get?” He sat back and grinned at me like a happy well-fed cat.  
“Just some sweets. No parents or money remember?” He sat up with a start.  
“Oh yeah.”  
“What do you want, Malfoy?” I huffed, sick of the pleasantries.   
“Look, I’m failing Potions again. I need your help.” He looked embarrassed and didn’t seem to want to look up from the desk.  
“Oh? I don’t see how that’s my problem.” I sat back, mimicking his stance from a moment ago.  
“If you do I’ll get everyone to stop calling you ‘Scum’ and I’ll tell Patsy to lay off.” He offered and I considered it.   
“I’ll settle for you calling me by my name.” I decided.   
“Okay, Smith.” He offered his hand and I considered it.  
“My name is Fay. And you have a deal.” I shook his hand and was surprised to find nothing but sincerity in him.  
I got out my potions book and we started to study. He wasn’t nearly as bad as he was making out, just lazy really. He kept rounding up ingredients and not considering the direction he was stirring.   
I agreed to meet him again at the same time next week. I told him if he failed his exam he could call me whatever he wanted. That earned me another sincere smile.   
He was as good as his word. After a few days, no one except Louise called me ‘Scum’ anymore and Pansy Parkinson had grown bored of her anyway and found new people to torment without needing her.  
This of course meant that dear Louise hated me more than ever. She’d twisted the problem in her mind, she couldn’t have brought this on herself. It was all my fault.   
Unfortunately for her, no one would listen to her. She was starting to get a reputation for backstabbing and had a lot of trouble getting anyone to talk to her much.  
Even Loony Lovegood was more popular, and she talked to thin air a lot.  
After a little bit of planning, I was able to get confirmation that the evil thing wasn’t Sprout (though I doubted it would be) or Filch. I got the latter's confirmation from his cat, Mrs Norris. I encountered her in a hallway and offered her my hand. When Filch found her happily purring while I scratched her ears he was utterly aghast but seemed to soften a bit.   
He crouched to pet her with me and with her as the conduit I got a good look at him.   
A whole lot of resentment, anger, and self-loathing but not evil, despite what the other students thought.   
I was sat in the library with Draco the next Monday, prepping him for using mistletoe in potions. He was noting everything down carefully. At least I knew he was taking this seriously. Apparently, he feared his father’s anger if he failed and Potions was his worst subject.   
“Thanks, Father says if I pass all my subjects I can get something cool over the summer.” He said as he finished his notes and sat back.   
“No problem. Soon you won’t have to hide in the back of the library with me anymore.” I smiled as I said it but I noticed a change in his mood. Guilt was twisting around him. “Well, I assume we meet here so none of your friends see you getting help from a poor kid.”   
“Well yeah, you are a mudblood after all.” He rubbed the back of his head. The insult didn’t bother me.  
“I might not be a mudblood you know,” I remarked as I packed away my things.  
“Huh?”  
“Well, I have no idea who my parents are. They could have been muggles or one might not have been. Hey, maybe they were even from a really old wizarding family!” I laughed.  
“I guess you’re right.” He smiled again and we made plans for the next week.  
He was actually willing to walk out of the library with me. In the hall Potter and his friends rushed past, heading into the library. I shook my head and Draco scowled.  
“They’re always up to something, those three,” I said and he looked at me curiously.  
“What do you mean?”  
“Well, they’re always off in odd corners, muttering. It’s like they want to be in trouble.”  
We turned towards the great hall together, though he stood a little further apart.  
“Yeah, I got Potter with that once. Made him think we were going to duel.” He laughed at his own deviousness but I just rolled my eyes.  
“Anyway, I’ll see you in Transfiguration.” I turned away from him and headed for the Hufflepuff table. It was fairly empty as lunch was almost over.  
When I sat down, Louise (who had been sulking by herself) took off like her cape was on fire and I had to shake my head again. So silly.

I’d been right about Potter’s ability to find trouble, so had Draco. When I got up the next day the castle was abuzz at the news. Potter, Weasley, and Granger were caught in Hagrid’s hut with a baby dragon of all things. Draco had caught them and immediately reported them, only to get in trouble himself for breaking curfew.   
Having suffered a month's worth of detentions myself I felt a little bad for him and said as much in Transfiguration.  
“I wish it was lines. I have to go and help that idiot Hagrid in the forest tonight.” He huffed.  
I felt frozen to my core and got him to repeat himself. He started on a rant about the unfairness of it and didn’t notice me have to sit down.  
The forest. There was someone evil in the castle but that was a person. Whatever was in the forest was something else entirely. I’d felt several more things die in pain and agony over the past few months. The idea of people I knew and even had begrudgingly started to like going in there to be slaughtered by it turned my stomach.  
I stayed after class to speak to Professor McGonagall. I told her my fears and he shot them down.  
“I understand you are scared for your classmate's safety, young lady, and that's commendable, but they will be perfectly safe,” She said as she nearly shoved me out the door to go to my next class.  
By the time classes finished for the day and I was sat with Petra and Jane in the common room I was feeling truly ill. They urged me to go and see Madam Pomfrey but I refused, saying I just needed rest.  
“She’s worried about her little boyfriend.” Sniped Louise from nearby. “So chummy with Draco now aren't you, Scum.”  
“Give it a rest, Lou.” Petra sighed.  
“You all hate me for being friends with the Slytherins but here's Fay making doe eyes at Malfoy and you don’t care!” She got up to yell at me but I didn’t have the energy.  
“We ‘hate’ you because you used what you knew about all of us as ammo to make them like you, dummy.” Petra snapped back. “If Fay has managed to make a truce with Draco then that's good.” Petra didn’t even look at Louise as she stormed off.   
“You okay?” Jabe touched my leg and I smiled at her.  
“Just a headache,” I reassured her.  
In reality, I’d barely noticed Louise’s rant. I was pushing myself to the limit, trying to lock on to Potter, Malfoy, and the others as they moved through the forest.   
“Come on, let's put you to bed.” She and Petra gently guided me to our room and forced me to lie down, leaving me in the dark.   
I lay still, searching hard for the emotional trails that would lead me to them. At last, I found one, Hagrid. A trail of guilt and sadness as he trudged through the woods with Hermionie and Ron who were mostly just scared.   
I thought of pushing the idea of leaving into their heads but honestly, that idea was probably fairly prominent already.   
I gasped at a sudden spike of primal fear not too far from them. I focused on it and found Potter and Malfoy, Potter was frozen in place and Malfoy (in a much smarter move) was running in terror from something that made me dizzy with its power.  
It was heading towards Harry when something angry and primal intercepted it and snatched him away.   
Now I was the one in danger. The thing, whatever it was, felt me. It was moving around, pushing back against my mind as I read its intent as easily as you’d read ten-foot-high words on a wall.   
It was amused.   
I pulled back with everything I had and lay on the bed in a cold sweat and wept bitterly. The thing in the forest and the thing in the castle were the same.


	8. Chapter 8

I woke up in the morning with the worst headache I’d ever had. I dragged myself to class despite Petra and Jane’s protests. Professor Sprout asked me several times if I wanted to continue but I kept going.   
I managed to relax a little when I saw Draco in the hallway and then Potter and his friends at lunch but still wasn’t able to eat more than a few bites of my food.   
Unable to face Defence against the Dark arts I asked Jane to take me to Madam Pomfrey who gave me a potion and told me to go to bed.  
I did just that, curled up in the dark I drifted off but the painkiller had an unfortunate side effect. My defenses were down.  
This happened to be the night that the thing I’d been trying to find and warn people of made its move, Potter and his friends in hot pursuit.  
I woke to find it long past lights out but I needed to move. I got up and stumbled out to the bathrooms, splashing cold water on my face and trying to make sense of what I was sensing.   
I sat on the cold tiles as they helped me focus.  
It was easy to track Harry and his friends, especially after one of them was hurt. They headed on through some kind of gauntlet. My abilities seemed to have been heightened and I was getting flashes of what they were seeing as well as feeling.   
Then I was drawn from them. I could almost see him, it was so obvious now I cursed myself for not noticing immediately what the source of the soulless, vile feelings was.  
I was up and scrambling for the door before I even knew it. I ran through the common room, almost falling over a footstool. I was just in my Pajamas, no shoes or socks or wand but I needed to get help.  
If they faced that thing they would die. I knew it as you know gravity will pull you to earth.  
I ran from the basement and collided with a wall in the dark. Stopping only to reach out for the closest person. There, not far.  
I pelted onwards, tripping and falling several times before rounding a corner to see him, wand raised in alarm, its tip lit up to burn away the dark. Professor Snape.  
“Miss Smith? What on earth are you doing up this time of night?” He was angry but he could see I was distressed. Concern. He was concerned.  
“No time. It’s him he’ll kill them, you have to help, now!” My words tumbled out and I snatched at his hand, turning to pull him in the direction of the darkness. He resisted.  
“What are you talking about? Are you unwell?” He pulled his hand from me and I finched. Harry was in there, with him, with it. I could feel its dark pleasure at his presence like a cloying choking thing wrapped around my throat.  
“It's Harry! Harry Potter! He’ll kill him!” I knew I was crying, tears falling as I separately pushed my mind at him trying to get him to move, to understand. “Quirrell!” I managed at last to name my fear and his eyes went wide. He understood and he knew the danger.  
I snatched his hand again and this time he let me lead him.   
I tore upstairs and around corners until we came to the door that led to the gauntlet. As Snape reached for the handle I felt it.   
Burning cracking rending. It was like someone had set my brain on fire. I know I fell, I know I was screaming.   
Something, someone was being torn apart, and somehow I was being torn apart with them. When at last it ended my eyes rolled back and I went limp. I could hear running feet and hear shouts and calls of distress before I lost the light and fell to the dark.

When I woke I was in the hospital wing. I sat up slowly and looked around. Bright sunlight blazed through the windows and I shielded my face from it as I sat up slowly.   
“Ah! See I knew you wouldn’t be asleep too long. Poor thing!” A woman dressed in a nurse's uniform approached and checked my temperature as well as my reactions. My voice was rough and I had a fair few bruises but otherwise, I was fine.   
I asked for some water and as she bustled off I looked around the room. A few beds away from me, surrounded by boxes of chocolates and flowers was Harry. He was alive.   
I got up slowly and padded over to him. I was in some kind of nightgown and nothing else but the cold floor was welcome.  
He was very deeply asleep. I could feel the shape of his dreams as he lay there.  
“He will be fine. Likely he’ll wake in another day or so.” I turned to the voice and found the Headmaster stood there.  
“And the- the thing. Whatever Quirrell was?” I asked him, my voice barely above a whisper.  
“Gone, destroyed”  
“No.” I turned from him to look at Harry then headed back to my bed.  
“Miss Smith, you understand that we have questions.” He followed me as I sat back down on the bed. “How you knew what was happening, how you saw the events you weren't there for.”  
“I’m an empath.” I lied.  
“I see.” He was unsure so I looked into his eyes, not as strong as touch but it helped to make the connection better.  
“I can feel what others feel. Love, hate, boredom, evil.” I shuddered. “I felt it, that thing. I felt when Harry hurt it. Felt it leave Quirrell. It’s not dead. I don’t think it can die.” I began to twist the sheets of the bed and I felt tears prick my eyes. I was so angry at how calm he was.   
“Why didn’t you tell anyone?”  
“Would you have believed me?”  
He didn’t answer that out loud but I felt it. He wouldn’t have believed, he would have doubted me.  
“Empaths are usually fairly popular.” He said after a moment's silence. I knew what he was saying. Harry’s bed was surrounded by get well messages and gifts. I had a couple of cards and a single chocolate frog.  
“Animals like me. People don’t.” I say and he nods.   
“Regardless, we are glad you raised the alarm when you did. I thank you.” He steps away then looks back.   
“We have told people that what happened to you was a seizure, brought on by the migraine you’d been suffering that day.”  
“I was sick and left my house looking for help. Snape found me and brought me here.” I added and he nodded sagely.  
“Exactly.”  
“Thank you, Headmaster.”

I was well enough to leave that day. Petra and Jane hovered around me for the rest of the week but I soon recovered.  
Harry woke up and even made it through the exams.  
By a significant effort so did I, I even managed to secure a passing grade in Potions for Draco. He had been the one to send me the chocolate frog apparently. Quite a large gesture, coming from him.   
On the last day of term, Hermione found me returning some books to the library and asked me to come with her. She brought me into a quiet corner and admitted she saw me convulsing at the doorway to the various challenges she and the others had battled through.   
She apologized for doubting my resolve to help them, seeing that despite being sick I’d done my best. She offered her hand and I shook it, feeling her resolve and her satisfaction at talking to me.   
I still didn’t like her but respect helps.   
Gryffindor won the house cup. Pretty much just because the Headmaster wanted them to. He gave points to Harry, Ron, Hermionie, and even their housemate Neville. None for me though. I was the dirty little secret to be swept aside. Honestly, I understood Slytherin’s disappointment. Their win was stolen from them simply due to events beyond their control. If Harry was in one house, Ron another and so on it would have been fair but no. Dumbledore just wanted them to win.  
Jane and Petra promised to write to me, Louise avoided me and Darell gave me an unexpected bear hug as we left the platform to head home. I watched them all get picked up by their parents and was reminded bitterly of who I was.  
Still, I was alive and I was now a real witch (not that I’d be able to do anything with it yet). I may not have any family, or money, or a real home but that was something.  
Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's the end of year one.
> 
> I'm intending to write the full seven years and maybe more. This is the first time I've written something from a child POV so please comment and let me know how I can improve!


End file.
